The Right Time to Buy

At the bottom of Jungfrau Mountain, I browsed Swiss pocket watches in the quaint town of Lauterbrunnen.  

The woman behind the counter wore glasses, and her gray hair was poofy.

“May I help you?” she asked.

 

Now that she focused on me, I could no longer peruse the watches from a safe distance.  I couldn’t skip out of the store without feeling guilty for treating the merchandise like free museum exhibits.  None of the watches had price tags on them, so I inquired partly out of curiosity but mostly due to a latent desire to possess such a significant object of class and wealth.

I told myself I may buy one that costs less than $150, but I expected to be deterred by exorbitant prices that would eliminate an arduous decision.  I find the burden from heavy contemplation is easily removed by forces outside my control.  If I simply could not afford a watch, my impulses would not have to battle my higher reason.  A debate would be impossible.    

 
Spending money on luxurious items is a lot like eating chocolate muffins.  I know the muffin is unnecessary and potentially harmful in large quantities, yet I manage to convince myself to eat it.  Every human must be installed with a self-destruct button. 

I shouldn’t buy this watch for several reasons.  I already had a means of telling the time.  I would have to pick up some extra shifts or be stingy in other areas.  Plus, I harbored a typical American anxiety toward strangers stealing my possessions.  What was I to do for the remainder of the trip?  Install locks on the zippers of my tent?  Barred access would only incite a determined thief who could easily knife his way through the nylon rain-cover.

But, another voice in my head began, I was in Switzerland now, and I don’t know when or if I would ever return.  If I managed to protect my treasure and fend off the burglars, I’d have a souvenir to cherish for the rest of my life.  This was beginning to sound like a good idea, and I could feel myself changing from an idle window-shopper into a prospective buyer.

I pointed a wavering finger at the watches with ornate covers, and the shopkeeper lay out several on top of the glass display.  I narrowed my choices down to two and began to make peace with the fact I could not back down at this point.  The watches were roughly $200 apiece, higher than the figure I intended to subtract from my diminishing savings. 

One watch was silver with the red Swiss flag in the center.  The design on the back was simple and relatively unremarkable, but I didn’t want something too flashy.  The other also had the Swiss flag in the center, and the cross was surrounded by a halo of Switzerland’s regional flags.  On a ring outside of the halo, animals were engraved in gold.  On the reverse side was Jungfrau, the Swiss Alp I visited.  The flags reminded me of all the nations I traveled to during my trip to Europe.

“The flag with the bear is for this region here,” the shopkeeper said.

“I’ll definitely remember that one,” I said, “It’s the region where I spent so much money.”

She opened the steel case and wound the watch.  As the second hand began ticking, tiny cogs spun.  I could see the mechanics of time on the opposite face of the clock. 

“It is a very strong steel case,” the shopkeeper said.  “You won’t damage the watch.”

She palmed the watch and clicked it open with her thumb.  She handed it to me, and I fumbled around with the button.

“You made it look so easy,” I said.

“Once you have handled it for two or three days, your hand will know what to do automatically.”  Her sales tactic was subtle, but effective.  I much prefer making transactions with women, who tend to be less aggressive than the men.

I handed her my debit card and said, “At least if I buy this my firstborn won’t have to.”  I was referring to the offspring that is currently only an idea and an expectation in the far-off future.  I do not even possess a mate with which to produce a child, but the jewelry commercials suggested that I needed flashy accessories to entice a woman to sleep with me.  So perhaps buying a pocket watch for my nonexistent child was the preliminary step to granting that child existence.

When the shopkeeper showed me the price in American dollars, I searched for symbolic meaning to attach to this shiny possession to avoid being struck with buyer’s guilt for accruing an unnecessary belonging.  There must be something I could signify about the nature of time and the awareness that as every second ticked away that was one second more that would never tick again. 

All that has been expressed before in a number of ways.  Nonetheless, that justification sounded better than the fact I was a victim of a consumerist culture conditioned into buying things to stave off boredom and to distinguish myself from poor people.  I was afraid my life had no meaning and buying shiny objects helped to distract me from such scary thoughts.  I could stare at my pile of junk and convince myself I was onto something here.  Surely, the purpose of my existence could be purchased at the department store, and if they didn’t have it in stock, the mall definitely would.

“You’ve been wanting this for a while,” Bridget consoled me as the shopkeeper wrapped up my Swiss pocket watch.  “It wasn’t an impulse buy.”

The truth was I wanted to want the watch for quite some time.  I enjoyed pretending to own one without actually spending the money.  I’ve developed a penchant for shopping without buying——for being a minimalist with my possessions.  Aside from my bicycle and my small library of books, all of my belongings can fit inside a large hiking backpack.  I’ve adopted a philosophy that disdains clutter and embraces simplicity, so I surprised myself when I handed over my debit card. 

Was I relapsing?  Had I already abandoned my new lifestyle?  I envisioned myself checking the time like a classy gent in upscale restaurants that warrant men to wear decent pants.  Would I have to buy new pants now?  This could really spin out of control unless I used this watch wisely.  Each time I consult the hour, I’ll remind myself to live cheaply and worry not of my humble possessions.  As I admire the cogs keeping track of the seconds, I’ll remember to never spend so much money in a single day for a long, long while.